


What Are Friends For?

by Sacryde



Category: Super Junior
Genre: Angst, Jealousy, M/M, One-Sided Attraction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-12
Updated: 2019-10-12
Packaged: 2020-12-13 17:41:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21001604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sacryde/pseuds/Sacryde
Summary: For the sake of his best friend, Heechul will do anything.





	What Are Friends For?

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted [here](https://sacryde-riots.livejournal.com/7966.html)/[here](https://oheiina.livejournal.com/1798.html) in April of 2009, and it won the [Heechul Kissing Massacre](https://heechulpetals.livejournal.com/112155.html) contest on LJ.
> 
> No edits have been made.

*********

There was no way Heechul could possibly concentrate. No way in Hell. Not with _him_ slinking around the practice floor the way he was, with the hip thrusts thrown in to utter passionate perfection and sex that just practically oozed off of him. Heechul groaned, barely noticing as he tripped over his own feet but managing to scream loudly when he felt something smack him on the back of his head, yet again.

"Yah! Why do you keep hitting me?"

"Because you keep forgetting the moves!" Kangin yelled, glaring at Heechul as the music stopped. 

"I remember all the moves! It's you who's getting in the way!" Heechul yelled back, scowling at Kangin and crossing his arms stubbornly, letting his eyes narrow into mere slits. He was _not_ in the mood for this right now.

"Heechul, do you want to drink?" Hankyung asked, and instantly Heechuls’ eyes snapped to Hankyung, despite how hard he had been trying to ignore the Chinese man. Heechul merely glared at him before turning around to walk outside, needing some fresh air desperately. Logically, he knew that it wasn't Hankyungs’ fault that he kept getting distracted, but he felt his frustration build as he thought of the many times during dance practice that his eyes would be drawn to the other man, effectively making him forget where he was and what he was doing.

Almost as soon as he walked through the door, he let out a loud shriek, barely noticing the birds flying away at the sudden loud noise. He screamed harder, trying to vent the frustration at his inability to get things right despite how much he tried. He yelled, needing _someone_ to honestly hear how much it hurt to see the Chinese man sometimes. He felt the tightness in his chest start to slowly subside as he fell to the ground on his knees, panting as he tried to gather his breath once more. He felt the calmness take over and sighed, running a hand through his hair. He wasn't sure why he felt this way, or what this feeling was, but he knew it couldn't continue this way any longer. Something had to give.

*********

Heechul grinned as he entered his dorm, kicking his shoes off merrily and practically dancing his way into the kitchen for some much deserved soju.

The concert had ended _hours_ ago, but his heart had yet to calm down. It kept thudding painfully in his chest, over and over again until he was sure it was going to burst. He had just done the most amazing thing in his entire life; he had kissed a man. On stage. In front of millions of people who had no choice but to watch.

It felt amazing.

"..Heechul?"

Heechul gasped in surprise at the sudden whisper, whipping around to see none other than Hankyung standing in the kitchen with a cup of coffee, looking almost...sad.

"Shit! Don't scare me like that!" Heechul groaned, leaning against the wall and holding a hand over his heart which was now threatening to beat through his chest at a rapid speed. All this pounding could not be good for his health.

After a long moment, Heechul sighed and glanced up at Hankyung with curious eyes, only now noticing how upset the emotional Chinese man looked. "Yah, what's wrong?"

"I heard you kissed Jungmo on stage."

Heechul blinked, his brows furrowing in confusion as several things flew through his mind. One: How did Hankyung know that already? Two: Why did Hankyung look so sad about it? And Three: What was this strange tightening in his chest?

Heechul sighed, flicking Hankyung on the forehead and offering a coy smile. "What? You worried that I'm gay or something?" Heechul chuckled, shaking his head at the bewildered expression that overtook the Chinese man's face. It was so adorable, how his every thought was reflected in his expression. "Don't worry, I'm not into guys. It was just a little fanservice, ya know? It's not like I'm gay or anything."

Hankyung sighed, making Heechul grin. He took it as a good sign and grabbed Hankyungs’ coffee mug, taking it with him as he wandered off to his bedroom, a strange weight filling in his chest. He took a sip of coffee as he shut the door, briefly wondering what this new feeling was. It certainly wasn't anything he was used to, but for some reason he felt like he was lying to his best friend.

He shook his head, grumbling something to himself as he fell into bed. Why the hell was he feeling guilty all of a sudden?

*********

"I'm sure they won't ask you about it," Leeteuk said, giving his motherly smile as he patted Hankyung on the shoulder, watching as the younger man merely nodded. Heechul stood behind the two, his eyes watching Hankyung closely. He could already tell that the overly emotional man was near tears, and he felt some kind of protectiveness stir inside of him.

"Yeah, and if they do, I'll shut them up!" Heechul said with his trademark smirk, catching the sharp glare Leeteuk sent him, "Don't give me that look! I didn't mean I'd punch them! Even if it does sound very tempting..."

"Heechul, you do one thing to ruin the image of this group and I will personally--"

"Please welcome, Super Junior!" the host said from the other room, the sudden sound jolting all of them and even making Leeteuk pause in his threat. After a brief glance at each other, the members of Super Junior walked out onto the set, smiling and waving as if there wasn't anything going on behind the scenes. They could worry later, but for just this one moment, they needed to pretend that all was well - for Hankyung's sake.

*********

"Now, recently it seems that one of your members has somehow been caught up in a scandal, and for once it isn't Heechul!" The audience laughed as the members of Super Junior suddenly tensed, most noticeably Hankyung and Heechul. "Oh, but it seems Heechul isn't too happy about that! Maybe he just likes being the center of attention? Is that why he gets involved in all those scandals?"

The audience laughed as Heechul tried to play it off, laughing and giving his trademark smirk. "Even with my record, I don't think I'll ever be able to catch up to the number of scandals you've been involved in, so it would be stupid to do that for attention."

The audience cheered Heechul on as the host hung his head down in embarrassment, though he was still laughing at the absurdity of the situation. The host looked up and smiled, waving his hand to hush the audience as he focused his attention on Hankyung. Heechul glared at the host, trying to show through his expression exactly how much he would regret it if he brought up the scandal. Unluckily for all of them, the host noticed nothing and instead went on to ask the question that everyone had been dreading.

"Now, it seems that when you were in China with Super Junior M, someone saw you and took a picture of you holding hands with a guy, looking very lovey-dovey. Could it be that the rumors of you being gay are true?"

After a few seconds of silence, Heechul glanced at Hankyung, growling under his breath when he noticed the state the other boy was in. His eyes were wide and afraid, and his mouth kept opening and closing as if reaching for a proper response that kept eluding his grasp. Heechul rested his hand on the other boys shoulder, turning his glare once again towards the host, who was now looking around, seemingly confused. 

"Yah, don't even joke about that, you idiot! Of course it’s not true! Hankyung isn't gay!" Heechul yelled, growing more frustrated by the second. An audible gasp resonated through the audience as they heard the tone in Heechul's words, not expecting that degree of harshness even from the infamously outspoken Heechul.

"Ah, that's right. You two are very close, aren't you?" The host asked with a mischievous glint in his eyes. Heechul gulped, his eyes widening as he realized that what would come next would in no way be good. "You've also had similar scandals surrounding you, haven't you, Heechul? And you've also been filmed and photographed kissing other men, seemingly just for fun. But what if it's actually you who's gay and you're just upset that Hankyung beat you to the punch? Or maybe you two are in a secret relationship, and that's why you're jealous of the man Hankyung was holding hands with?"

Heechul froze, his eyes widening as he took in the hosts words. With the way things were going, this could turn out very, very bad. He felt his mind go blank under the sudden pressure, knowing that he had to do something to protect Hankyung, and he had to do it fast.

So, without much thought going into it, Heechul turned to his side to grab Hankyung by the back of the neck. He barely paused to take in the startled gasps from the other members and the audience before pressing his lips to Hankyungs’ hard. Even if it was for the sake of dispelling rumors, he knew the second their lips touched that he should not have done that. He felt the back of his throat tighten painfully as he pulled away, taking in Hankyungs’ expression of shock and confusion. An expression that could easily be mistaken for repulsion.

Heechul turned to the host, smiling a despondent smile as he tilted his head to the side, pointing at the still surprised Hankyung. "See? He can't be gay when he's so disgusted by me kissing him."

It took the host a long moment to get over the shock, but once he did he just nodded and continued with the interview, going over to the next question. Throughout the interview, Heechul was abnormally quiet as he processed what he'd just done and the innate reaction that had his stomach flipping over and over again. His heart kept beating faster and faster as he thought back on the kiss. Although it had only been a few seconds, it felt far more intense than when he'd kissed any of the other members. Sure, he'd always thought that Siwon and Sungmin were attractive, and he didn't exactly mind kissing them on stage, but he didn't feel anything from the kiss itself. Sure, there had been a thrill from doing something so daring and bold. But he hadn't felt anything _close_ to this feeling. This feeling of stressful bliss that wouldn't leave the back of his throat. And that was when he realized it.

He was in love with Hankyung.

*********

After the interview, everyone headed back to their respective dorms in silence. Even the normally loud and teasing Kangin couldn't find proper words to say, and once they reached their dorms, they all went back without saying a single word to each other. Even the 30 minutes after the kiss hadn't been enough to relax the air between them.

Heechul sighed, kicking his shoes off and heading straight to his room, ignoring the pointed looks he was getting from the others in his dorm.

"Heechul, about today..." Heechul turned, looking at Hankyung who was standing in the kitchen doorway awkwardly, as if he didn't know what to say. Heechul sighed, knowing that now, more than ever, he needed to be a good friend. He couldn't tell the Chinese man about his newly discovered feelings, even if it was killing him to hide it. Just this once, he knew he needed to hold back how he really felt - for the sake of Hankyung.

"Don't worry about it."

"But..."

"I said don't worry about it. You're my best friend. I had to help you out. After all, what are friends for?" Heechul spoke, a wry smile gracing his lips. Hankyung merely stared at him, and before he could give the Chinese man another chance to speak, Heechul turned on his heel and headed back towards his room, making sure to shut and lock the door behind him. 

For once, Heechul couldn't scream. He couldn't yell or throw things, despite how much he was hurting. He merely lay on his bed, curled into a little ball with his pillow squeezed tight against his chest. He felt tears slowly start making their way down his cheeks, but he did nothing to wipe them away. There was no reason he shouldn't cry; it always hurt being rejected, even if the other had no idea they'd done the rejecting. But Heechul knew he had to hide how he felt from now on. He would never let those rumors start up again; he would never let Hankyung be upset again, even if he himself had to suffer. For once, he knew that how he felt wasn't nearly as important as keeping Hankyung safe. But that was to be expected. After all, what are friends for?


End file.
